Just Go Shopping!

So... in response to yesterday's question:

What Am I Going To Do? (about being so chubby?)

Patriot that I am, I came up with the same answer that our President (or, as I like to call him, His Accidency) devised right after 9/11: Just Go Shopping!

To that end, I purchased the following items from a well-known low-price online retailer:

Next Avalon 26-inch Comfort Bike


Edge 250 Dual Piston Rower

Dare I recall all the other purchases I've made over the years in my quest to regain the lithe body of my misspent youth?

Here is but a sampling:

• One (1) TREK Mountain Bike (never a comfortable bike to ride, hence it's sat unused in my garage for 9 years)
  
• Two (2) pairs rollerblades (one well-used and eventually dumped, the other gathering dust in my hall closet)
  
• Countless mostly-unused gym memberships
  
• Four (4) Weight Watchers memberships
  
• Several exercise videos, most recently: Bellydance for Beginners
  
• Several books, including
  • Outsmarting the Female Fat Cell
    
  • Susan Powter's Stop the Insanity!
    
  • Dr. Atkins Diet Revolution
    
  • The South Beach Diet
    
  • Bill Phillips' Body for Life
    
  • The Macrobiotic Path to Total Health
  
  

But *this* time, I swear, it'll be different. ;-)